The shoes didn't fit. It was an omen.

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Parental Alienation Syndrome

I thought today I’d write about Lila’s flaw. She’s a person who was alienated from her real father by an overbearing, neurotic, and paranoid mother. Psychiatrists have named this as Parental Alienation Syndrome.

What is it?

It’s where the residential parent constantly degrades and/or vilifies the non-custodial parent and/or the extending family members. It’s a form of poisoning that causes the child to either fear or hate the non-custodial parent and/or extended family. This form of brainwashing also causes false memories and the child becomes confused.

Symptoms of a PAS Child

  • Anger
  • Loss of lack of impulse control in conduct
  • Loss of self-confidence and self esteem
  • Clinging and separation anxiety
  • Developing fears and phobia
  • Depression and suicidal ideation
  • Sleep disorders
  • Eating disorders
  • Educational problems-the ability to solve problems i.e. math
  • Bed wetting
  • Drug abuse and self destructive behavior
  • Obsessive compulsive behavior
  • Anxiety and panic attacks
  • Damaged sexual identity problems
  • Poor peer relationship
  • Excessive feelings of guilt
  • Child shows excessive hatred and fear

Please NOTE that PAS children suffer from some of these symptoms, not  necessarily all.

 When you follow Lila’s character through her journey, you will find out how much of a relationship she didn’t have with her own father as a child.  Her mother, Babs, in many instances blasts off with negative remarks about her father and the paternal grandmother as well as her younger sister, Katy. She also degrades Lila’s stepfather in front of her and the whole world to see.

Plus, Lila’s got phobias.  A major germ-phobia. Things scare her. She also lacks self-confidence even though she’s a talented psychic/medium. Through her entire life the girl was told how to feel and think about people and things in her life.

But eventually, Lila evolves, blooming into someone who listens to her gut and her dead Gram. By the end of this novel, Lila earns her badge of self-confidence.  However, the germ phobia will probably continue. She is human, after all

I’ve also attached the following sites for your review on this particular subject.

Symptoms of Parental Alienation (PA)

Dr. L.F. Lowenstein

Legal and Psychotherapeutic Approaches to the Three Types of Parental Alienation Syndrome Families


  1. One of the things that strikes me while reading and editing the book has been the oppressiveness of Babs, the different ways she's abusive. It feels natural that Lila is so hesitant and takes time before she breaks out. She's been so badly treated by an abominable mother that it seems she feels as if she doesn't deserve better.

  2. Exactly, Sir Wills. Thank you for being one of my beta-readers.


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